Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
