I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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