508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
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