fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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