He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
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Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
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I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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