no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
