Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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