I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
