Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize