Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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