WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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