Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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