thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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