don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
