idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize