I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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