Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
where am i from again
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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