Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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