So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
