Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
