I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
