Already got asked if we're dating
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
