Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
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Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
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Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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