Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
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