Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Randomize
