Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
