So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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