Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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