I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
