Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
