I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I supernannyed him into submission
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize