She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
