Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
