This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
You've changed since you got that strap on
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
