So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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