mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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