Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
