Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
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