cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize