Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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