Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize
