xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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