i was born a porn star she said
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
