I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Someone shattered a urinal.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
