where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
My pussy is not your playground.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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