Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize