Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
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We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
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You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
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