There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
