my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
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Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me