CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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