Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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